The Epic AwesomenessCoolness of a Love Potion
by theAkuRokuFaNaTiC
Summary: James, wanting to obtain the affections of Evans, devises to brew a love potion.  But before he can give it to her, it has to be tested first.  His guinea pigs are less-than-likely to forgive him for this.  JamesXLily and crack SiriusXRemus.


**A.N. : What is in this story is merely fun, not meant to be anything suggestive. James is just testing something out, to the chagrin of other characters. *laughs evilly* Harry Potter belong to J. K. Rowling, not me. Oh, what I wouldn't do!**

James, having nothing productive to do during Professor Slughorn's extremely boring lecture, found it most effective to flip through his textbook, marking some of the potions that he would have to try to concoct at a later time. One potion, he noticed in particular, was a Love Potion, and, seeming to be fairly easy to brew, marked it. If worse came to worse, he could probably just ask Remus to brew it for him.

The young Potter glanced over sideways at Evans, who was feverishly taking notes on the class lesson. No one knew how she got anything from it, but Professor Slughorn had already taken a fancy to her.

Snivellus was also jotting something down in his textbook, but it didn't really seem like notes. The greasy-haired child seemed to ponder something before quickly writing it down. For some odd reason, James found an annoying thought in the back of his mind of what would happen should he give Evans that love potion. It played out in his mind as such:

"_Oh, James, I never noticed that you were so . . . epic . . . "_

"_Yeah, well, I am . . . epic . . . "_

_Evans swooned slightly, and a Cherub version of Peter floated down from the sky to catch her. "You are so . . . awesome . . ."_

Yep, Lily Evans would be begging just to touch his robes. It would be awesome, but he'd just have to find the time to brew that magnificent potion.

The bell rang almost like an angel chime, and James looked over cautiously at Peter to make sure that he hadn't sprouted wings and a halo during the class period. Seeing that he didn't, James collected his things and walked out with Sirius. He didn't dare tell his equally conniving friend about his epiphany, since Sirius would probably take the idea for himself.

Though they were friends, James didn't put it past him.

Remus caught up with the two, lugging around a pointless shoulder bag. Honestly, he never just brought the bare essentials to class, just because he was 'smart.'

Evans walked past the three briskly, with Snivellus trailing not far behind. Peter was behind (but not following) them, and he asked James why he had given him the oddest look during class. Being sarcastic, James replied that it was because Peter was beautiful.

That shut him up, at least.

Next was a free period, where the four of them could work on their assignments. Slughorn hadn't assigned any potions homework, so Remus questioned as to why James had brought along his book.

"Just looking up potions, Moony."

The werewolf rolled his eyes slightly and went back to studying his Divination book. Obviously, he did not have 'The Sight' or 'The Eye', or whatever Trelawney said it was. Thankfully, with careful guessing and awesome teamwork, James and Sirius did. They were now the two favorites of the slightly crazy woman. Still, since they were awesome, she was awesome.

Peter looked up from his Divination textbook as well, but then quickly hid back in the comfort of words. He obviously felt awkward after Potions.

James made a careful list of all the things that he would need, and seeing that it looked simple enough, kept wondering how awesome it'd be to have Evans totally in love with him.

"_James, you're so . . . cool . . ."_

He knew he was, which made it all the better.

The next day, James was actually looking forward to Potions, and he practically skipped into the room, startling Professor Slughorn.

"What're we making today, Professor?" he asked eagerly.

After getting told something that he wouldn't be able to remember in his wildest dreams, James grabbed out his cauldron and prepared himself. Should he be lucky, he could possibly brew up a quick love potion.

And, thanks to Lily's never-ending questions, he did get plenty of time to make a quick one, and telling Sirius that it would be for a later prank, was assisted in clearing the cauldron before Slughorn noticed.

Next came the free period, which made James start to question whether or not he should give it to Evans immediately. After all, he had never made one before, and he really didn't want any horrible side effects to ruin their epic awesomeness/coolness of a relationship.

His guinea pigs came into the Great Hall, arguing.

In all honesty, James felt horrible about doing this to his closest friends, but seeing that he didn't want something horrible to happen to Lily, he slipped a bit of the love potion into both their cups of pumpkin juice.

"Sirius, you're not hearing me!" Remus shouted, fuming. Padfoot smirked.

"I know; that's what makes it glorious!" He took a swig of the laced pumpkin juice, and James couldn't help but flinch slightly. The sweet side of him almost begged Remus not to take a drink of his, but since the boy's voice was hoarse after yelling at Sirius, he took a sip.

There was a difference between a sip and a swig. The effects may not have been as strong with a sip, but with a swig, you could be in so much love that you might . . . well, at least they were in public and there were plenty of adults around to stop it if something naughty might happen.

The two stared at each other for a moment, and before long, Sirius had Remus by the arm, holding him close. James noticed in the corner of his eye Peter squeaking.

"S-Sirius!" Remus gasped, sounding every bit as girly as he looked at that moment. His eyes just seemed to get an innocent feel to them, and he shuddered slightly at the taller's touch.

James guiltily looked up at the professors, who were all watching the spectacle. Professor Trelawney had stopped mid-bite and was gazing, her mouth ajar. He noticed her mutter something under her breath, but the woman didn't take her eyes off of the two for a second.

Profesor McGonogall, on the other hand, looked slightly shocked. She, too, had stopped whilst eating but had gracefully swallowed her bite. The older woman had tried to avert her eyes, but the idea of watching two teenage boys in such a compromising situation was probably hard not to watch. Naturally, James felt horrible for even brewing the potion, but at least now he knew that it worked.

There was the sound of storming feet, and Evans marched over to where James sat. He gulped inwardly, preparing himself for a most horrible scolding.

"Potter, what did you do?" Lily asked, gesturing to Padfoot and Moony. Sirius had Remus on the table now, with his face not too far from the slightly younger teen's. "I didn't . . . know that they were . . . gay . . ." She whispered in a way that wasn't condescending, but it also didn't seem pleased.

Even Snape had stopped doodling in his potions book to watch. He smirked in a way that said something along the lines of, "it was only a matter of time before they came out of the closet." It was such an annoying smirk that James felt the need to punch it off his face. But he refrained, still worried about his friends' slowly diminishing sanity. How long did this potion last, anyway?

"Oh, Sirius, I never noticed that you were so . . . epic . . . " Remus breathed, gazing up adoringly.

"Yeah, well I am . . . epic . . . " Sirius replied, brushing a few strands of hair away from the werewolf's face. A light blush had crept onto Remus' face, and he turned away embarrassingly to attempt to hide it. Using a firm yet gentle touch, Sirius cupped his chin and turned it back to him. Never before had James Potter ever regretted something that he had caused like he did now.

Professor Trelawney had a small smile on her face, and she mumbled something along the lines of, "awesome."

Even Dumbledore had put aside his want to eat some delicious looking pudding to watch. He did not seem pleased nor did he seem exasperated, just pondering.

If that wasn't bad enough, the ghosts had started to watch. And, as luck would have it, Peeves, the ever-so-helpful ghoul, had already started making up a new song that he would bellow down the corridors for years to come.

Sirius' face was much too close to Remus', Professor McGonogall had finally decided, and she shot a harmless spell to split them apart.

"BUT I LOVE HIM!" Sirius begged, reaching out pathetically. And for a moment, just a moment, James honestly thought that he would throw up. Right then and there, in front of Evans.

One of the professors hurried off to inform Madam Pomfrey of the incident, hoping that it was some sort of hex or potion of some sort. The two boys were rushed away in a whirlwind of sorts, and James and Peter were left to wonder what had just happened. Lily cautiously stepped back over to Snivellus, and Professor Trelawney looked crestfallen. As far as James was concerned, she was still awesome, either way.

It would eventually come out that Remus and Sirius had, in fact, been under the captivating effects of a most powerful Love Potion, and being powerful, was also long-lasting. So, whenever James would come to visit the two in the hospital wing, Remus, being in his right mind after only taking a sip, only blushed slightly whenever Sirius' name was brought into conversation.

On the other hand, after taking a large and intoxicating swig, Sirius chose every other five minutes to shout in his loudest voice Remus' name in a sort of longing tone.

Oh, it was pathetic, but it was quite worth it to see that the potion would work on Lily, but James hoped desperately that she wouldn't take a swig the next time.

He walked out of the hospital wing slightly amused, slightly guilt-ridden, when he saw Evans walk past him, carrying a 'Get Well Soon' teddy bear. "It's for Remus," she explained without his asking. "He helped me with my Defence Against the Dark Arts homework, so I thought that this might make him feel better. And," she hushed her tone slightly so that one could hear Peeves' song ring through the hallways, "he'll have to put up with that for a while."

"Yeah, it kinda sucks."

"Did you . . . did you make that Love Potion? It was really strong, you know. Must've took some time."

James laughed sheepishly, never quite feeling this nervous around a girl like he did with Evans. She smiled lightly and took a step back. Peter came rushing up the hallway with the same teddy bear and stopped to see what the two were talking about.

Lily took another step back to turn around but, not placing her foot right, stumbled slightly. Instinctly, Peter jumped a little and helped her regain her balance. Sunlight was streaming through the windows, and James was starting to get an odd sense of recollection.

She gazed up with those striking emerald eyes. _"You are so . . . awesome . . ."_


End file.
